anata wa tsumetai kokoro ga imasu yo!

D: blah blah blah. kalagot siya.
C: ano ka man. nagahanap ka ng away?
D: (napaisip) feeling ko. pero kalagot man din gud siya.

now THIS song says it all. it says what's going on.

are you not the slightest bit confused? just the truth.
the speed at which we move blends so well. it's too soon.
separate yourself from what compels you to relinquish us.
push your weight on to me entirely.
stay away from me, stay away from me now.
unless you're gonna see, unless you're gonna see me out.
no, i can't dance unless it's slow or sad.
to a song that's far less obvious.
you're using me, do it slowly.
make it last until i have to go.
trust me when i say just a few more weeks. don't move.
resist temptation, or do as you see fit. just choose.
separate yourself from what compels you to relinquish us.
push your weight on to me entirely.
stay away from me, stay away from me now.
unless you're gonna see, unless you're gonna see me out.
no, i can't dance unless it's slow or sad.
to a song that's far less obvious.
you're using me, do it slowly.
make it last until i have to go.
stay away from, stay away from, stay away from me.
stay away from, stay away from me.





- i don't know what's happening to me. don't leave.

tsumetai kokoro ga imasu ka

aaahhhh...

gusto kong magmura ng malutong. promise. tang ina. yun. kanina pa nun gustong lumabas. tang ina. bakit nanaman ito bumabalik ng di oras. tang ina. di ko na nakikita talaga. hindi ko na maintindihan talaga. leche. naglagot jud ko. as in nag mug-ot ko, naglagot ko sa akong kinabuhi. nawad-an ko ug rason nganong naa pa ko diri. bisag ikaw, di na nako makit-an nganong naggunit ko sa huna-huna na okay ra na naa ka, kay dili pud diay.

wala ko kabalo kung ako ra ni, o kitang duha, nganong nawala man kalit, nganong murag wala na lang gyud ko giganahi. wa koy labot kung maayo pa ba ni o dili na, pero naguluhan na gyud ko. dili nalang siguro ta magkita hantud nakit-an na nako kung nganong naglisod ko karon. yawaa gyud ani ui. wala gyud nako mahinumduman kung nganong naing-ani naman ko.

globes and maps

what i'm listening to: globes and maps, something corporate
mood: somewhere between desperation and contempt

pakiramdam ko napakawalang kwenta nito. walang kwenta rin ang mga pakiramdam na ganito.

one day, i'll see you walk out that door.

i hate growing up. i hate this moving forward, because it entails a leaving behind, it makes sure that you are faced with consequences that you never even dreamed of or even considered before you decided to move on.


do you wanna leave or something?

siguro kung hindi ako nagmadali, wala sana ako rito. siguro kung hindi ko inisip ang mga bagay-bagay. sila naman din ang nagdesisyon ng ibang aspeto ng buhay ko, bakit hindi ko nalang inalay ang buong buhay ko? e di sana wala na akong iniisip pa, wala sana akong pinagdedesisyonan. wala sana akong buhay.

scorn. is there no choice at all?